Grief Counselling

Grief is a natural and emotional response to losing someone close to you, such as a friend, family member, or a beloved pet. In addition, other significant losses may include separation or divorce, a mental health diagnosis, terminal illness, moving away, unemployment, disability, or an ill family member.

Grief is a process that has no set patterns and differs per individual. Although, symptoms typically involve a deepening sadness, loss, anger, shock, and guilt.

Grief can affect one's level of functioning, both mentally and physically, where the individual struggles to complete daily tasks at home, can't concentrate at work, or is unable to leave the house.

For most individuals, though, feelings of grief and loss tend to decrease over time and can lead to a satisfying life again.

The proposed theory is that individuals go through five stages of grief after losing a loved one. And though not everyone has to experience all five to reach acceptance, they typically undergo several of these.

The five stages and symptoms of grief include:

Denial – avoidance, confusion, shock, fear

Anger – irritation, frustration, anxiety

Bargaining – seeking ways to change or undo circumstances, questioning what they could have done differently, struggling to find meaning

Depression – hostility, hopelessness, emptiness

Acceptance – exploring options, forming new plans, not forgetting loved ones but recognising this new reality

On average, 115 people die each minute in Australia, which is a difficult concept to grasp, and we often don't know how to come to terms with its inevitability. But similar to the birthing process, death has its own process, too. Therefore, understanding what happens to our bodies when we die might help us understand better how they function when alive.

During the physical process of dying, the brain and organs generate less oxygen, and the pulse becomes weaker. Heart rate, blood pressure, circulation, and breathing begin to slow down while the blood supply declines until breathing stops altogether.

There's this misconception that pain and healing have a time frame. However, letting go of grief is no easy task, regardless of how much time has passed.

Maybe you hold on to grieving your loved one because you are afraid to let go or are betraying them. Still, letting go does not mean forgetting but learning to live while your loved one is no longer present.

Nonetheless, if you feel your symptoms aren't improving and are too much to bear, there is help for grief and loss.

While grieving doesn't necessarily mean everyone needs mental health counselling, if you are experiencing persistent sadness, hopelessness, despair, struggling to function daily, and are not sleeping, it would be beneficial to seek grief counselling.

Grief counselling is a therapeutic method that counsellors use to help individuals manage their symptoms, cope with pain and loss, and healthily process their emotions.

Every individual seeking counselling services comes through the door with unique experiences and stories to tell. Therefore, a counsellor can provide a treatment approach according to the person's specific needs.

Existential therapy centres on free will and human existence, including death, responsibility, freedom, and life's meaning. It uses a positive approach and encourages individuals to strive while simultaneously accepting their limitations.

Counsellors help individuals learn to balance the awareness of death without feelings overpowering them. In other words, we realise that death is inevitable for everyone. Still, if we continue to ignore its reality or hyper-focus on it, it may cause overwhelming anxiety. Therefore, anxiety counselling can help one make the most of life and treasure what they have.

Techniques include

• Gaining self-awareness

• Confronting negative internal thoughts

• Creating an identity and learning how to re-create yourself

• Building meaningful relationships

• Finding purpose, value, and meaning

Cognitive-behavioural therapy teaches individuals to identify how their distorted thought patterns create internal conflict, problem-solve challenging situations, and resolve the relationship between their thoughts, beliefs, and feelings. It increases their understanding of emotions and enhances confidence by recognising their capabilities.

Counsellors educate individuals on identifying and changing destructive thought patterns that create negative emotional and behavioural consequences. In other words, if a person struggles with anxiety and expects everything to turn out badly, they will learn their thought processes negatively affect behaviours and actions.

Techniques include

• Journaling moods and thoughts

• Focusing on the positive in life

• Not jumping to conclusions

• Identifying and challenging triggering thoughts

• Eliminating black and white (all-or-nothing) thinking or catastrophising (always expecting the worst)

Acceptance and commitment therapy teaches individuals mindfulness by understanding how suppressing and controlling their emotional experiences creates more challenges and doesn't support their mental wellness. It focuses on challenging negative self-talk and accepting one's pain and difficulties without judgment, thus creating more optimism and fewer issues.

Counsellors listen to how individuals talk about themselves, their loss, and other challenges. They help them work on eliminating repetitive thought patterns and behaviours that create more problems and learn the difference between what does or doesn't require immediate attention, what they can and can't change, and how to stop fighting their past.

Techniques include

• Being present in the moment

• Accepting that life brings challenges

• Allowing thoughts without judgment

• Committing to behavioural changes.

• Observing situations from an outside perspective

Anyone who has ever experienced the death of a loved one knows how devastating of an experience it is. You didn't just lose them physically but also emotionally, and your life is forever changed. However, you don't have to suffer alone when you can find comfort and support through counselling.

With Sami, you will get the help you need by working through the grieving process together. You will have the space to talk about your loss and experiences while learning methods to cope and move past your pain. You will learn to set personal goals that give you purpose and keep you thriving. And, best of all, you will learn to lead a meaningful life again.