The Anxiety of 'What Ifs' - When Your Brain Won’t Stop Forecasting Doom
We've all asked ourselves "What if...?" at some point. But for those living with anxiety, these thoughts can spiral into an unrelenting mental storm. What if I fail? What if I embarrass myself? What if something terrible happens? These questions aren’t fleeting; they become mental loops that can disrupt sleep, increase stress, and hijack daily life.
In this blog, we unpack the psychology behind "what if" thinking, explore why it feels so consuming, and offer strategies to break the cycle.
Understanding "What If" Anxiety
"What if" anxiety is a form of anticipatory anxiety. Instead of responding to something that has already happened, your brain tries to pre-empt possible future scenarios - most of which are negative or catastrophic. While occasional worry is normal, anxiety thrives on uncertainty and takes this natural process to an extreme.
Why It Happens
Intolerance of Uncertainty: Anxiety often stems from a need to predict and control outcomes. When that’s not possible, the mind fills in the blanks with worst-case scenarios.
Perfectionism: If you’re someone who fears failure or mistakes, your brain may default to negative forecasting to help you "prepare" or avoid risk.
Protective Mechanism: Ironically, "what if" thoughts are often your brain's misguided way of keeping you safe.
Signs You're Trapped in the "What If" Loop
You might be stuck in a loop of anxious forecasting if you:
Repeatedly ask yourself the same hypothetical questions
Experience racing thoughts or trouble sleeping
Avoid decisions or situations out of fear of possible outcomes
Seek excessive reassurance from others
Feel stuck, paralysed or emotionally exhausted
If this sounds familiar, you may benefit from speaking with a professional. Our anxiety counselling services provide a compassionate space to unpack these thought patterns and develop more helpful ways to cope.
Breaking the Cycle: Strategies That Help
While it's not possible to eliminate all anxious thoughts, you can reduce their hold on you. Here are some strategies that might help:
1. Label the Thought
Recognise when you’re having a "what if" thought. Labelling it as anxiety can help create some distance.
Try saying, "This is a worry thought, not a fact."
2. Challenge the Likelihood
Ask yourself: How likely is this to actually happen? What evidence do I have?
Often, you'll realise the scenario is far-fetched or unlikely.
3. Play the Scenario Through
Consider: If the worst did happen, what would I do?
This exercise can shift your focus from fear to problem-solving.
4. Ground Yourself in the Present
Use mindfulness techniques to bring your attention back to the here and now.
Breathe deeply, take a walk, or observe your surroundings in detail.
5. Limit Reassurance-Seeking
It may feel comforting in the moment, but over time it fuels anxiety by reinforcing the idea that danger is imminent.
6. Set a "Worry Time"
Give yourself 10 minutes a day to focus on your worries. Outside that time, gently redirect your attention.
For more on grounding techniques and emotional regulation, check out all of our different counselling services including therapy that helps to overcome panic.
Finding Help for Anxiety
Anxiety doesn’t need to run the show. If your thoughts feel overwhelming or you’re struggling to function in daily life, professional support can help. At The Counselher, our therapists are experienced in helping people untangle anxious thought patterns and build a life based on clarity, not fear.
If you feel like you could benefit from counselling, contact Sami or book a session using the button below.
